I think I'm being too hard on myself. I do want to save, and I want to cut down on spending, but I also want to enjoy life. Part of enjoying life, for me, means buying clothes! Labeling myself as "addicted" merely because of that is not fair. I don't have a constant need to go shopping (nor do I have withdrawal symptoms if I don't go shopping!). But browsing online does relieve stress, and it does lead to me finding things that are cute. My real problem is that I have never had to conform to a budget, and I think I need to allow myself some time to get used to the idea. I was making a lot of money at my last job, my bf makes a lot of money... and both he and I were of the mentality "if I see something I really want, I'll just buy it." It's a really satisfying mentality... but now, having moved down to this part-time job, it's just not realistic anymore. That hasn't totally sunk in yet. So on the one hand, I feel guilty, and have been writing these posts trying to "punish" myself, and on the other hand I'm still stubbornly feeling like I can and should buy whatever I want. And then my bf, who still can follow "see it, want it, buy it" is pressuring me to cut down, and that's frustrating... so I suppose I'm rebelling against both myself and against him!

I did my summer shopping. I'm going to take back the excess and be happy with the remainder. I'm going to work towards getting used to the constraints of a budget, and keep in mind that in 2 years, I'll be making much more that I did before, and after my loans are paid off, I can be budgetless again!


HS @ Our Debt Blog said...

This is me!! change is very hard, but at least your taking action and looking at your debt and realizing that you need to change.

Good luck!!


Sunflowers said...

Thank you! :)

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