Valentine's Day for the Haters

So H has let it be known that he hates Valentine's Day. Apparently he had a lot of bad experiences as a kid that have shaped how he feels about it as an adult. I, on the other hand, have always been in love with V-Day, primarily thanks to my mom and experiences at school. I had so much fun handing out valentines to my classmates! And my mom always had chocolate and little presents waiting for me when I got home. (I already received my V-Day presents from her in the mail; a delivery of chocolate covered strawberries and cheesecakes!) M spoiled me a bit for V-Day as well; I was given a painting done by him for our 1st, and a framed compilation of our best pictures for our last. I don't consider it a "girls' holiday." I gave M presents, I give my friends and family presents (even if it's a little box of chocolates). I believe in spreading love everyday, of course, but it's awesome having a special day devoted to it.

H doesn't agree. He says he feels it "cheapens" love and he hates the commercial aspect. Regardless, I had planned to buy him something I knew he really wanted, and I was looking at recipes to make a nice dinner (which is not something I do often). And then the other day he and our roommate went on a "let's bash V-Day" fest. He's said he wishes I didn't like Valentine's Day. I'm not expecting anything, although I admit I'm disappointed, because I put a lot of thought into his gift and the night in general.

I can't decide if I should (a) just scrap the idea of getting him anything and treat the day like any other, (b) spend the night out with friends, or (c) go all out, be selfless, get him the present and make the dinner, knowing there likely won't be reciprocation.

Have any of you ever changed someone's mind about V-Day?


Nd.chic said...

It's too bad that his past experiences have shaped him into how he is about Valentine's Day. By the way, how is M? Do you still talk to him?

The Lost Goat said...

I'd do whatever makes you happy and realize that H is very unlikely to ever change his mind about V day.

Money Matters said...

I say do whatever makes you happy. Maybe he will start having nice memories regarding the holiday.

Anonymous said...

I'm a huge fan of you so the fact that H. doesn't bend to your every whim makes me not like him very much and I say D) dump him! hehe.

I love Valentine's Day too. You can be my Valentine if you want!

smart sorority girl said...

I would give anything to be with my husband for Valentine's Day. There is nothing wrong with making a nice dinner and giving him a gift. Just because he doesn't feel the same way doesn't mean that you can't do something nice for him. Spend time with him that night because there are plenty of wives, girlfriends, and fiancees out there that won't be able to see their significant other that night and for almost a year after that. They probably won't even hear from them that night. There is no reason to be mad at him just because he isn't a Valentine's day fan. Don't let something like this ruin the happy relationship that you seem to be enjoying! Just try and accept him for who he is. Besides...maybe you could change his mind by wrapping him a gift that he would like to see on you. ;) Happy Valentine's Day!

Sunflowers said...

We've mutually decided to make dinner together and open a bottle of champagne to celebrate. I'm ok with that. ;)

@B: Aww, I'll be your Valentine! :D

@smart sorority girl: Happy Valentine's Day to you too! I don't know that I'm really mad at him. Just a bit hurt/sad. But I understand what you're saying.

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