Thanks everyone

I appreciate all the comments on my last post... even though I'm generally discounting them and deciding for myself (as per usual). ;)

I'm in a much different place than I was in January. I have a job (2 jobs, in fact), I'm emotionally recovered, M and I are at peace and back to being "best friends" (yeah, it happens). The relationship with the new guy (we'll call him H) is a bit odd; it was never meant to be anything serious, but it's evolved in a natural way (albeit backwards - sex --> love --> feeling totally comfortable with one another). Our open relationship is veering towards monogamy (but hey, the unconventional aspect of all of this is not a necessarily a bad thing. And I may continue dating -- he's fine with that, I might add).

There was one comment that made me pause, because it made absolutely no sense. Did I mention I was currently paying $1500 to live in 1 bedroom of a house with my mother (and others)? Someone said if I can afford $1200, I should be putting it towards debt. And what, living in a box? The situation I'm entering now is going to save me $550/mo. And that can potentially go towards debt.

Someone else wondered if there wasn't some other valid reason that my mom disliked H. Nope. My dad likes him. Friends like him. He's just the "intruder" who stole away the happy family time. And she probably doesn't like how quickly I slept with him. Yep, everything's been quick with him. It's been intense. People can argue that my break-up with M has something to do with it, but I think I just got REALLY lucky in terms of how great a match we are.

I'm probably going to bring in someone to live in our 2nd bedroom, bringing the rent down considerably. That may or may not be temporary. If the situation in general doesn't work out, so be it. At the least, it'll be an experience. :p

7 comments:

Sylvia said...

Sorry about the rent comment -- I didn't read things carefully about what you were currently paying and assumed that it would be more expensive. But if moving out is now cheaper for you financially (which is great, and can you then use that difference to pay off debt?), can your mom still afford to continue to live in the house? I can sympathize that living with a parent after college is really really hard (I did it and it was pretty awful and splurged on a place by myself after I moved out), but does this mean that your mom now needs to come up with $1200/mo?

stackingpennies said...

It is a good sign that everyone else likes him, except your mom.

I'm glad that you are in such a good place now!

Whether or not your breakup with M has anything to do with the intensity of your new relationship is irrelevant. You are in this relationship now. The intense feelings are fun and hard to reason with anyway, so I don't think it is a mistake to run with them... I am usually a rational person, but i'm a sucker for love & adventure. :)

ND Chic said...

I totally make my own decisions and deal with what other people think later so I can relate to you. Its nice to hear that everybody else like H. Your mom has some control issues and I think that it probably is unhealthy for you to live with her.

Max Parker said...

Glad to hear that you are in a better place and moving towards a balanced life. Relationships can be challenging so take your time with H. Also hope that you find a roommate for the extra bedroom that will help you save some $$. Hope you have a nice weekend - Max Discount Car Insurance Pro

Serendipity said...

You know what? I always keep in mind that even when I blog about something and want advice, I'm going to do what I want to do anyways. I always remember when I blogged about Rambo and I back in December and everyone told me to leave him. I didn't and I can honnestly say we're happy again. And I think I did what was right for me.
We care about you so of course we voice our opinions. But at the end of the day, you're going to do what you feel is best for you. And no one can argue with that.

Paula @ AffordAnything.org said...

I love the idea of having someone rent the 2nd bedroom -- having roommates is a great, great way to make a major reduction in your expenses!!

Mrs. Pancakes said...

im your newest follower..feel like im coming into a party that has already been started...eek!!! nice to meet you though!

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